A COLLECTION OF GOOD WORDS
搞笑
Funny
Probably the most dangerous and powerful industrialist of our age.
可能是我们这个时代最危险最有权势的实业家。
If you had a million Shakespeares, could they write like a monkey?
如果你有一百万个莎士比亚，他们能写得像猴子吗?
There are two sides to every question: my side and the wrong side.
每个问题都有两面:我的一面和错误的一面。
Girls pee pee when they see me. Navajos creep me in they tee-pees.
女孩们看见我就尿尿。纳瓦霍人让我爬进他们的圆锥形帐篷。
A widow of doubtful age will marry almost any sort of a white man.
一个年龄可疑的寡妇几乎会嫁给任何一种白人男子。
There is a pleasure sure, In being mad, that none but madmen know!
发疯确实是一种乐趣，只有疯子才知道!
Maybe! Maybe! Maybe if your aunt had a beard, she'd be your uncle.
也许!也许!也许如果你姑姑有胡子，她会是你叔叔。
And me I'm so fly, I swear I came in a plane then landed in a lot.
而我，我是如此的飞翔，我发誓我坐过飞机然后降落了很多次。
It's kind of ironic that if I get my Ph.D., I'll be a real doctor.
有点讽刺的是，如果我拿到了博士学位，我就会成为一名真正的医生。
Do I have to use my feet? Can I knock the window out with my head?
我必须用我的脚吗?我能用头把窗户敲出去吗?
A couple of people thought I looked familiar, but it was like, No.
有几个人觉得我看起来很面熟，但我的反应是，不熟悉。
They've said i want to direct pictures. I couldn't direct traffic.
他们说我想导演电影。我不能指挥交通。
KEEP EXPLORING
沿着这个主题，再读几句。
Our scientific age demands that we provide definitions, measurements, and statistics in order to be taken seriously. Yet most of the important things in life cannot be precisely defined or measured. Can we define or measure love, beauty, friendship, or decency, for example?
我们的科学时代要求我们提供定义、测量和统计数据，以便被认真对待。然而，生活中大多数重要的事情都无法精确定义或衡量。例如，我们能定义或衡量爱、美、友谊或体面吗?
When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things - not the great occasions - that in retrospect give off the greatest glow of happiness.
当我们回忆过去的时候，我们通常会发现，那些最简单的事情，而不是那些伟大的时刻，在我们回想的时候，会给我们带来最大的快乐。
Age appears to be best in four things, - old wood best to burn, old wine to drink, old friends to trust, and old authors to read.
年龄似乎有四样东西是最好的:旧木头最好烧，陈酒最好喝，老朋友最好信任，老作家最好读。
What though youth gave love and roses, Age still leaves us friends and wine.
虽然青春给了我们爱情和玫瑰，但岁月给我们留下了朋友和美酒。
In life, all good things come hard, but wisdom is the hardest to come by.
生活中，所有美好的事物都来之不易，但智慧却是最难获得的。
What could be more beautiful than a dear old lady growing wise with age? Every age can be enchanting, provided you live within it.
有什么能比一位随着年龄增长而变得聪明的亲爱的老太太更美丽呢?只要你活在其中，每个时代都是迷人的。