A COLLECTION OF GOOD WORDS
搞笑
Funny
When a dog bites a man that is not news, but when a man bites a dog that is news.
狗咬人不是新闻，人咬狗才是新闻。
She's a beautiful ship alright. Shapely. Seductive. I'm gonna Fly Her Brains Out!
她是艘漂亮的船。秀气。诱人。我要把她的脑袋飞出去!
Love one person at a time, that’s the motto I’ll try to get my clones to live by.
一次只爱一个人，这是我的座右铭。
There has never been an age that did not applaud the past and lament the present.
从来没有一个时代不为过去喝彩，为现在悲叹。
Do you know that Old Age may come after you with equal grace, force, fascination?
你知不知道，你的晚年也会以同样的优雅、力量和魅力降临?
It's funny that until I actually met my husband, I never thought I'd get married.
有趣的是，直到我真正遇到我的丈夫，我才想到我会结婚。
To thrive in life you need three bones. A wishbone. A backbone. And a funny bone.
要想在生活中茁壮成长，你需要三根骨头。一个叉骨。一个支柱。还有一根有趣的骨头。
Women priests. Great, great. Now there's priests of both sexes I don't listen to.
女性牧师。太好了,太好了。现在我不听男女神父的。
I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming.
我经常想把我的烦恼淹死，但我不能让我的妻子去游泳。
A good pun may be admitted among the smaller excellencies of lively conversation.
一个好的双关语可以被承认在较小的优势，活泼的交谈。
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
你最好把披萨切成四块，因为我饿得连六块都吃不下。
Statistics show that of those who contract the habit of eating, very few survive.
统计数据显示，在那些养成饮食习惯的人中，很少有人能活下来。
KEEP EXPLORING
沿着这个主题，再读几句。
Youth is not measured by the age of a person, but by the curiosity a person keeps.
青春不是由一个人的年龄来衡量的，而是由一个人保持的好奇心来衡量的。
Our scientific age demands that we provide definitions, measurements, and statistics in order to be taken seriously. Yet most of the important things in life cannot be precisely defined or measured. Can we define or measure love, beauty, friendship, or decency, for example?
我们的科学时代要求我们提供定义、测量和统计数据，以便被认真对待。然而，生活中大多数重要的事情都无法精确定义或衡量。例如，我们能定义或衡量爱、美、友谊或体面吗?
Let us never know what old age is. Let us know the happiness time brings, not count the years.
让我们永远不知道什么是老年。让我们知道时间带来的快乐，而不是数着岁月。
What though youth gave love and roses, Age still leaves us friends and wine.
虽然青春给了我们爱情和玫瑰，但岁月给我们留下了朋友和美酒。
Imagine staying awake all night not because you're worried about the future but because it's fun.
想象一下，整夜不睡不是因为你担心未来，而是因为它很有趣。
What could be more beautiful than a dear old lady growing wise with age? Every age can be enchanting, provided you live within it.
有什么能比一位随着年龄增长而变得聪明的亲爱的老太太更美丽呢?只要你活在其中，每个时代都是迷人的。