Instinct is stronger than upbringing.

本能比教养更强大。

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I suppose for whatever reason I actively welcome being put down, something which perhaps goes back to my upbringing - that accusation of not being worthy which could be laid at one's door.

我想,不管出于什么原因,我都积极地欢迎被人贬低,这也许可以追溯到我的成长经历——一个人被指责为不值得被贬低。

A lot of my upbringing was about denying or fretting or evading.

我成长的过程中,很多时候都是在否认、烦恼或逃避。