A COLLECTION OF GOOD WORDS
搞笑
Funny
I don't think traveling back in time on an empty stomach is a good idea.
我不认为空着肚子回到过去是个好主意。
Nothing important has ever come out of San Francisco, Rice-a-Roni aside.
除了米-阿-罗尼，旧金山从来没有出过什么重要的消息。
Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
永远记住你是独一无二的。就像其他人一样。
Insomnia: A contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents.
失眠症:一种传染病，常由婴儿传染给父母。
Television: A medium. So called because it's neither rare nor well done.
电视:一个媒介。之所以这么叫，是因为它既不稀有，也不好吃。
I can't think why mothers love them. All babies do is leak at both ends.
我想不出妈妈们为什么爱它们。所有的婴儿都是两头漏尿。
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
我从来不喝水，因为鱼在水里会做出恶心的事情。
Style is not how you write. It is how you do not write like anyone else.
风格不是你写作的方式。这就是你不像其他人那样写作的原因。
When I feel like exercising I just lie down until the feeling goes away.
当我想锻炼时，我就躺下来，直到这种感觉消失。
Napoleon thinks that I am a fool, but he who laughs last laughs longest.
拿破仑认为我是个傻瓜，但笑到最后的人笑得最长。
It's funny, because I never think of myself as Little Miss All-Together.
这很有趣，因为我从来没有想过自己是一个小女孩在一起。
You know you're getting fat when you can pinch an inch on your forehead.
当你能在额头上捏上一英寸的时候，你就知道自己变胖了。
KEEP EXPLORING
沿着这个主题，再读几句。
When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things - not the great occasions - that in retrospect give off the greatest glow of happiness.
当我们回忆过去的时候，我们通常会发现，那些最简单的事情，而不是那些伟大的时刻，在我们回想的时候，会给我们带来最大的快乐。
A true friend will dance with you in the middle of the streets to no music and think it's completely normal.
一个真正的朋友会在没有音乐的情况下和你在大街上跳舞，并认为这是完全正常的。
Youth is not measured by the age of a person, but by the curiosity a person keeps.
青春不是由一个人的年龄来衡量的，而是由一个人保持的好奇心来衡量的。
Imagine staying awake all night not because you're worried about the future but because it's fun.
想象一下，整夜不睡不是因为你担心未来，而是因为它很有趣。
The longer and more carefully we look at a funny story, the sadder it becomes.
我们对一个有趣的故事看得越长越仔细，它就变得越悲伤。
Our scientific age demands that we provide definitions, measurements, and statistics in order to be taken seriously. Yet most of the important things in life cannot be precisely defined or measured. Can we define or measure love, beauty, friendship, or decency, for example?
我们的科学时代要求我们提供定义、测量和统计数据，以便被认真对待。然而，生活中大多数重要的事情都无法精确定义或衡量。例如，我们能定义或衡量爱、美、友谊或体面吗?