A brick could be a breath freshener for a dragon. But so could a mint-flavored baby.

对于龙来说，一块砖可以是呼吸清新剂。但是薄荷味的婴儿也可以。

A brick could be placed in an empty circular room, so that when you tell a dunce to go stand in the corner, he won’t feel so stupid and will know where to go.

一块砖可以放在一个空的圆形房间里，这样当你让一个笨蛋站在角落里的时候，他就不会觉得自己很傻，也会知道该去哪里。

A brick could be put on the end of a scale, to determine if the other end of the scale holds a lie or the truth.

一块砖可以放在天平的一端，以确定天平的另一端是谎言还是真理。

A brick could be used as a brick. Clever, right?

一块砖可以当砖用。聪明,对吧?

A brick could be used as a device to deliver bad news. Sometimes it's better to be blunt.

砖头可以用作传递坏消息的工具。有时候直言不讳会更好。

A brick could be used as a measurement of time. Yes, just think how stylish you’ll look with a brick duct taped to your wrist!

一块砖可以用来测量时间。是的，只要想想手腕上绑着一条砖风管，你看起来会多么时尚!

A brick could be used for pressing grapes into wine, and a magician could then cover up that wine with a blanket and turn wine into water.

一块砖可以用来把葡萄压成酒，然后魔术师可以用毯子盖住酒，把酒变成水。

A brick could be used to block a mouse hole. But something better that would not only block the hole physically, but also psychologically, would be to stuff a dead rat in the hole.

一块砖可以用来堵住一个老鼠洞。但更好的方法不仅是在身体上，而且在心理上，把一只死老鼠塞进洞里。

A brick could be used to direct traffic. Use a brick from the scene of the accident, where some driver ran into a brick wall.

一块砖可以用来指挥交通。用一块砖从事故现场，那里的一些司机撞到了砖墙。

A brick could be used to measure the speed of gravity, but an apple offers a tastier option.

砖头可以用来测量重力的速度，但苹果提供了一个更美味的选择。

A brick could be used to represent a waste of time. Just stare at it for a while and you’ll see what I mean.

砖头可以用来表示浪费时间。盯着它看一会儿，你就会明白我的意思。

A brick could be utilized to teach the danger of procrastination. Ignoring the brick and pretending everything will work itself out is not going to transform it into a wall.

一块砖可以用来教导拖延的危险。忽视那块砖，假装一切都会好起来，不会把它变成一堵墙。

A brick could replace the cardboard bill on a baseball cap. On a windy day, no gust will knock your hat off.

一块砖可以代替棒球帽上的硬纸板。刮风的日子，没有一阵风能把你的帽子刮下来。

A brick has ten holes in two rows lining the center—perfect so that you and nine of your friends can each stick your little dicks in the brick after a few beers.

一块砖的中心有两排十孔，这样你和你的九个朋友就可以在喝了几杯啤酒后，各自把你的小弟弟塞进砖里。

A child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.

一个五岁的孩子就能明白这一点。派人去接一个五岁的孩子。