From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend reading it.

从我拿起你的书直到我把它放下，我笑得前仰后合。有一天我打算读它。

From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.

从这里到这里，从这里到那里，到处都是有趣的东西。

From where I’m sitting, I am the centre of the Universe!

从我坐的地方看，我就是宇宙的中心!

Funerals aren't scheduled.

葬礼没有计划。

Gags die, humor doesn't.

玩笑会消失，幽默不会。

Genius feels like an over extended Helium balloon about to burst, and everyone criticizes you for not having a conventional way of coping with it.

天才就像一个快要爆炸的过度膨胀的氦气球，每个人都批评你没有一个传统的方法来处理它。

Getting to a higher spiritual level is like increasing your credit score. You get a lot more points for sinning and repenting than if you have no credit history at all.

达到更高的精神境界就像提高你的信用分数。如果你没有信用记录，你会因为犯罪和悔过而得到更多的分数。

Girls who look passionate, and dance passionate, and have passionate eyes, usually kiss brilliantly. They also bite. Be careful when dancing close.

那些看起来充满激情，跳舞充满激情，眼神充满激情的女孩，通常会吻得很漂亮。他们还咬人。近距离跳舞时要小心。

Go and do, don't sit and stew.

去干吧，别坐着不动。

Gods don't like people not doing much work. People who aren't busy all the time might start to think.

上帝不喜欢不工作的人。那些不总是很忙的人可能会开始思考。

Good god what men can do to their brains when their cocks are hard.

上帝啊，当公鸡变硬的时候，人的大脑会发生什么变化?

Good humor and laughter are far too wonderful not to come straight from the heart of God.

好的幽默和笑声太美妙了，不能不直接来自上帝的内心。

Good humor is a tonic for mind and body. It is the best antidote for anxiety and depression. It is a business asset. It attracts and keep friends. It lightens human burdens. It is the direct route to serenity and contentment.

好的幽默对身心都是一种滋补。它是焦虑和抑郁的最好解药。它是一项商业资产。它吸引并留住朋友。它减轻了人类的负担。这是通往宁静和满足的直接途径。

Goodbyes, they often come in waves.

再见，它们常常一波接一波地涌来。

Gossip is just a tool to distract people who have nothing better to do from feeling jealous of those few of us still remaining with noble hearts.

流言蜚语只是一种工具，用来转移那些没有更好的事情可做的人的注意力，使他们不再嫉妒我们中少数几个仍然拥有高尚心灵的人。