I wake up every morning at nine and grab for the morning paper. Then I look at the obituary page. If my name is not on it, I get up.

我每天早上9点起床，然后抓起晨报。然后我看了看讣告页面。如果上面没有我的名字，我就起床。

I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.

我想让我的孩子拥有所有我买不起的东西。然后我想搬去和他们一起住。

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair

我想让我的孩子拥有我在成长过程中从未拥有过的东西。比如胡子和胸毛

I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. In other words, I want to get married.

我希望我的时间被琐事、琐事、约会和争论占据。换句话说，我想结婚。

I want to end global hunger by feeding half the world’s starving people to the other half.

我想通过把世界上一半饥饿的人喂给另一半饥饿的人来结束全球饥饿。

I want to make something of myself. I believe it’s called a statue.

我想有所成就。我想它叫雕像。

I want to meet a guy named Art. I'd take him to a museum, hang him on the wall, criticize him, and leave.

我想认识一个叫阿特的人。我会带他去博物馆，把他挂在墙上，批评他，然后离开。

I want to own a wind farm. Don’t breathe, or you’ll undermine the price of my crop.

我想拥有一个风电场。别喘气，否则你会破坏我庄稼的价格。

I want to say something so embarrassing about September that even the leaves start blushing and turning red.

我想说一些关于九月的尴尬的事，甚至连树叶都开始脸红，变红了。

I want to spend less time talking about myself, and more time listening to what other people have to say about me.

我想少花点时间谈论自己，多听听别人对我的看法。

I want to write my own eulogy, and I want to write it in Latin. It seems only fitting to read a dead language at my funeral.

我想写我自己的悼词，我想用拉丁文写。在我的葬礼上读一门死语言似乎再合适不过了。

I wanted to tell her “I love you” back, but I guess in waiting for the perfect moment (the next commercial break), I ended up completely forgetting.

我想对她说“我爱你”，但我想在等待一个完美的时刻(下一个广告时段)时，我完全忘记了。

I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know.

我很高兴能够及时回答，我也确实这样做了。我说我不知道。

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

我嫁给了一位法官。我应该要求陪审团的。

I was supposed to write a romantic comedy, but my characters broke up.

我本来要写一部浪漫喜剧的，但我的角色都分手了。