If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for a moment suggesting that you should - you would find nothing but an enormous drool gland.

如果你打开一个婴儿的脑袋——我并不是在建议你这么做——你只会发现一个巨大的唾液腺。

If you're going to read minds, start with a simple one.

如果你想读心术，从简单的开始。

If you're not writing, you're wronging.

如果你不写作，那你就错了。

Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he is not; a sense of humor to console him for what he is.

人类有了想象力来弥补他的不足;幽默的感觉来安慰他。

Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he isn't. A sense of humor was provided to console him for what he is.

人类有了想象力来弥补自己的不足。他的幽默感是用来安慰他的。

Imagine that. You just can't let your entire life go by worrying about your damned thighs. You'd never find happiness.

想象一下。你不能因为担心你那该死的大腿就放弃你的整个生活。你永远不会找到幸福。

Immature poets imitate; mature poets steal.

不成熟的诗人模仿;成熟的诗人偷窃。

In a completely sane world, madness is the only freedom!

在一个完全清醒的世界里，疯狂是唯一的自由!

In a series of events, all of which had been a bit thick, this, in his opinion, achieved the maximum of thickness.

在他看来，在一系列的事件中，所有的事情都是有点厚的，这达到了最厚的程度。

In eternity there is no time, only an instant long enough for a joke.

在永恒中没有时间，只有一瞬间的时间足够用来开玩笑。

In our world, I rank music somewhere between hair ribbons and rainbows in terms of usefulness.

在我们的世界里，我认为音乐的用处介于发带和彩虹之间。

In politics stupidity is not a handicap.

在政治上，愚蠢不是障碍。

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

在现实生活中，我向你保证，没有代数这种东西。

In the end everything is a gag.

最后，一切都成了笑料。

In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.

首先，上帝创造了傻瓜。那是练习。然后他制作了校董会。