A COLLECTION OF GOOD WORDS
搞笑
Funny
I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with Guess on it. I said, Thyroid problem?
我看见一个女人穿着一件运动衫，上面写着“猜猜看”。我说，甲状腺问题?
People who do comedy are always underrated because they make it look so easy.
做喜剧的人总是被低估，因为他们让它看起来很容易。
With any half-hour comedy, it kind of takes on its own life and finds itself.
对于任何半小时的喜剧，它都有自己的生活方式和自我发现。
Costumes are fun. Dress up like a pilot some night and watch as people stare!
服装是有趣的。某天晚上打扮得像个飞行员，看着人们盯着看!
The follies of youth become the vices of manhood and the disgrace of old age.
青年时的愚行成了成年时的罪恶，老年时的耻辱。
The good writing of any age has always been the product of someone's neurosis.
任何年龄的优秀作品都是神经症的产物。
Whatever you do, in the privacy of your own rain shower, is your own business.
无论你做什么，在你自己的私人淋浴，是你自己的事。
The longer and more carefully we look at a funny story, the sadder it becomes.
我们对一个有趣的故事看得越长越仔细，它就变得越悲伤。
Once I thought I found love, but then I realized I was just out of cigarettes.
曾经我以为我找到了真爱，但后来我意识到我的烟抽完了。
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
我没有参加葬礼，但我写了一封很好的信说我同意。
Ability is the art of getting credit for all the home runs somebody else hits.
能力是一门艺术，让别人击出的所有全垒打都得到称赞。
If flowers were boogers, I'd pick a few big ones and flick them on your grave.
如果花是鼻屎，我就摘几朵大的扔在你的坟上。
KEEP EXPLORING
沿着这个主题，再读几句。
What could be more beautiful than a dear old lady growing wise with age? Every age can be enchanting, provided you live within it.
有什么能比一位随着年龄增长而变得聪明的亲爱的老太太更美丽呢?只要你活在其中，每个时代都是迷人的。
A true friend will dance with you in the middle of the streets to no music and think it's completely normal.
一个真正的朋友会在没有音乐的情况下和你在大街上跳舞，并认为这是完全正常的。
Imagine staying awake all night not because you're worried about the future but because it's fun.
想象一下，整夜不睡不是因为你担心未来，而是因为它很有趣。
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
朋友不会因为你胖而节食。
Age appears to be best in four things, - old wood best to burn, old wine to drink, old friends to trust, and old authors to read.
年龄似乎有四样东西是最好的:旧木头最好烧，陈酒最好喝，老朋友最好信任，老作家最好读。
What though youth gave love and roses, Age still leaves us friends and wine.
虽然青春给了我们爱情和玫瑰，但岁月给我们留下了朋友和美酒。